If Parker wakes up in the night, he likes to move into our bedroom and sleep "next to Daddy." There is an extra comforter on the floor on Damian's side of the bed, and we bring his pillow and things for him to bed down there. He has been doing this since last September, when his world got turned upside down by seeing his Gramma Bug get carted off to the hospital in an ambulance.
We figured out what that "orange" business was, by the way. At night the shades do not block out the light from the street lamp, which casts an orange glow on the wall of their bedroom. He would talk about the "numbers" that "came out," and that's when I figured out that he meant the shadows made by the bars of Liam's daybed. He was also unnerved by the light at the top of the stairs, which he was afraid would "talk to" him. A couple of nights here without us, while Babcia stayed with them and we helped my mom, was enough to spark this fear of lights that came on and off, in a manner beyond his control, and made funny shadows everywhere.
He was already in a Daddy phase before the whole hospital incident. The week before, when we were on vacation in Gatlinburg, I could not so much as hand Parker his water without getting fussed at. "I want Daddy to do it!!!" After the event, Daddy became his security blanket. Every moment of the day: "Where is Daddy?" Momo we have always with us, but she doesn't seem to have the answers we need, and she is obviously no good at preventing disaster. Daddy is a rock, and we are certain that if we could just always have him two inches away, none of these unpleasant things would touch us.
Long after he has outgrown the original insecurity, Park has been enjoying the privilege of sleeping next to Daddy. But the manner in which this is executed has changed over the months and tells much about his budding maturity. In the initial phase, he used to scream for Daddy in the night, and ask, "Can you sleep next to me?" No, but you can sleep next to me, was the compromise; and pillows and comforter, lovey and animals were moved.
Gradually, terror subsided, but he would frequently fuss and cry, tossing and rolling until someone heard him and correctly interpreted that he needed to pee but was too asleep to know what to do about it. (That was back when he did not do a very practiced job of getting his shorts off by himself during the daytime, let alone in the sleepiness of the night.) By then it was an established principle that if he woke in the night, he got rewarded for his pains by getting to sleep next to Daddy.
He would go through periods when he would sleep through the night without waking. Then he began to get up and run by himself to D's side. The little face would peer into the pillow and whisper, "Daddy, can I sleep with you?" D would get up, take him to pee, move all his essentials, and tuck him in, with Parker radiating contentment. Sometimes I wake up in the morning and find D and P, one high in the bed and one low on the floor, in the exact same sleeping position, as alike as two peas.
One night recently, Parker arrived with pillow in hand and flopped down wordlessly in the usual place. D had to force him up for the bathroom trip, and he was asleep again before the accoutrements were tucked around him.
Last night, D and I woke to find Park turning on the closet light and then closing the door most of the way, which D always does to give a less overwhelming illumination in the bathroom. Parker peed and then came and lay down on his comforter. He graciously accepted when Daddy offered to bring his pillow, etc.
D found the PJ shorts in Parker's bed, where he had taken them off himself preparatory to using our bathroom!
